Life is messy. As a mom, wife, and working woman, there are days I feel like super-woman, then there are days I feel I’m not so super at all. There are days I feel I am raising well-mannered, respectful children, then there are days I wonder where I went wrong. There are moments when I feel I have a lot to offer my spouse, then there are times when I feel I have nothing left to give. There are mornings I wake up thinking I can “rock” my skinny jeans and heels, then there are mornings I wish I didn’t have to get dressed. And then to top it all off, I scroll through Facebook and feel I am alone in my struggle because everyone else on my feed seems to be getting “mom of the year” awards, with a glass of wine in their hand, while their 5 kids are perfectly posed in their pressed linens.
The constant pressure to “keep it all together” can be overwhelming. Between carpools, grocery shopping, piles of laundry, cleaning the house, baking cookies for the PTA, dentist appts, and trying to cook a meal other than frozen nuggets, there’s just no time for rest. And to top that off, we face the pressure to have a “family sit down dinner” that evening because we read about the importance of family dinners in a magazine at the dentist and now we just KNOW that if our child ever gets into an ounce of trouble, it all comes back to those family dinners that I, as the mother, didn’t orchestrate. But it doesn’t stop there. We run out the door, barely making it to their three different activities scheduled, because we talked to a mom after school whose son speaks five different languages, plays four different instruments, AND has scouts seeking him out for a soccer scholarship at the age of 7. We come home defeated, yell at the kids to shower, clean up the kitchen, go and actually make sure the kids USED the shower, tuck them into bed, and all we want to do is plop in bed and watch some mindless TV. However, we are married, and our husbands have different plans…we end up feeling they are just one more person needing our attention and we are exhausted. Fast forward to the next day and basically press “repeat”.
Thank God for my amazing circle of friends. When we get together, we can talk for hours, and nothing is off-limits. Sure, we talk about superficial topics such as the latest celebrity break up or an awesome deal at one of our favorite stores, but that is not where it ends. We also talk about our kids, our marriages, our work, our short-comings, our accomplishments, our struggles, our insecurities. There are times when we meet for lunch and realize we have been sitting there talking for hours and it felt like minutes. There never seems to be enough time with them. We laugh together (and often AT each other), we cry together, we encourage each other, and we pray for each other. Whenever I leave their presence, I feel more complete. I feel validated, I feel loved, I feel understood. I leave their presence a better person. I leave their presence and no longer feel alone. You see, there is beauty in vulnerability, and even the simple discovery that we are not alone in our struggles can be empowering.
So, my idea of an Instagram page (read prior) for working moms quickly turned into a blog where I could also write about the areas that we as women, often times, keep hidden. That’s why I will write to you as if I am talking out loud to my girlfriends. You see, life is beautiful. YOU are beautiful. But sometimes it’s a little messy, and that is OK. My hope is that somewhere along the way you will feel uplifted, encouraged, inspired, or if nothing else, that you are not alone…just as I feel after a 3 hour lunch with my girlfriends.
Welcome to my Beautiful Mess. I hope you’ll stick around.